It’s only February, but Amy Winehouse already has a strong lock on taking home the Hot Mess of the Year award come next Decemeber (Pete Doherty will really have to fall off the wagon hard to take that one back).
Apart from the myriad drug busts, bad dye jobs, boyfriend bustups, incarcerations and caught-smoking crack paparazzi snaps, Winehouse was just denied her U.S. Visa to perform at Sunday’s Grammys (no one’s gonna watch that thing anyhow; though she will be performing via satellite, whatever, just another form for her to phone it in).
To make matters worse, the producers of the upcoming Bond film – ambiguously and pretentiously titled “Quantum Of Solace”; it’s evidently a unrequited love story about scientists – have apparently given Wino an ulimatum of sorts: clean up your fucking piss-poor excuse for an act, or no fucking Bond theme for you.
That’s a fucking throwdown, huh? So basically she has until April to get clean or she can’t write the Bond theme or sing the one that’s been canned for her or whatever the fucking deal is. “That’s when [April] the Bond people make a final decision on who sings the theme. If Amy is clean then, it’s hers,” a source told the tabloid rag the UK Sun.
The Daniel Craig-starring Bond film is supposed to be dark and moody which would apparently be perfect for Winehouse who leads a dark and moody life filled with despair and substance abuse. “It’s another fantastic carrot being dangled to encourage her to give up drugs.” Seriously, to be recognized among the modern pantheon of greats that have been lucky enough to sing the Bond theme like Chris Cornell, Garbage and Sheryl Crow??
Hell, for that we’d give up sex permanently [ed. fat fucking chance].