Terrible Trailer Twosome: 'The Expendables' & 'Twelve' (Chace Crawford Busted For Pot Too)

Two trailers (and one poster) have arrived today that are both examples of how not to promote your film.

First up is the action extravaganza “The Expendables.” The film, a brainchild of Sylvester Stallone, stars or features every major action star of the last few decades, including Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Mickey Rourke, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Terry Crews, Randy Couture, Dolph Lundgren, Eric Roberts and Steve Austin. The film is about a group of mercenaries who are betrayed and blah blah blah. Basically, by the time this hits theaters on August 13th you will have seen the same story twice already in “The Losers” and “The A-Team.” This latest trailer is clever only in that it decides not to show any footage from the film, hoping that audiences will be suckered by all the BIG FONT names of stars flying at them.

As for “Twelve,” the forthcoming privileged-white-kids-doing-bad-things film starring Chace Crawford and Curtis “50 Cent” aka “Fiddy” Jackson, instead of not showing anything, the trailer does the opposite and pretty much telegraphs the entire story from beginning to end. To its credit, this trailer makes a lot more sense than the three-minute spot that hit the web (and was pulled) in April. But to its detriment, it’s a mess. It starts off with a voiceover that disappears completely while we get all the plot details and inevitable twists out of the way, before it reappears out of nowhere at the end. Basically, the movie looks like a third-rate take on standard Bret Easton Ellis material. No thanks. And is it any surprise that this was directed by Joel Schumacher? The film has wisely been pushed from its original July 2nd release date — where it would’ve squared off against “The Twilight Saga: Eclipse” — and settled on July 30th.

Oh and the irony. Crawford plays a drug dealer in the film, right? Well, life imitates art sorta: he just got busted for pot. Kiss those teen-y good guy roles goodbye.