The scent of baby oil and warm wine cooler fills the air. Shrieks, moans and giggles ring out as leather chaps squeak and bass-heavy, suggestive pop tunes grind forth from giant speakers. Lights flash; the air is thick with a two-way traffic of undergarments. Yes, “Magic Mike XXL” (our review is here) is coming to town, which is either a cause for celebration, indifference or insecurity depending on your gender, sexuality and general worldview. It’s not the kind of thing we usually attempt, but to cater to those who just can’t wait to see a little taut, rippling man-meat on display, or for those who are merely strip-curious, we thought we’d herald the arrival of the Channing Tatum-starring sequel to the Channing Tatum-starring original “Magic Mike,” by investigating —from a purely academic standpoint, of course!— the phenomenon of male strippers in the movies.
This is the part where I should make a “it’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do it” comment, and sure, it’s not been all bad. But the thing about male strip scenes is that not only are there far fewer than their distaff counterparts, but this variety is far more often played for laughs rather than for real erotic potential, and often comes from the point of view of the embarrassed male participant (“American Pie” is a good example there,which no one gets particularly turned on by). Before ‘Mike,’ there were very few cinematic instances where the straight women or gay men watching were going to get the equivalent of Salma Hayek (“From Dusk Till Dawn“) with that snake or Natalie Portman in the pink wig (“Closer“) or Demi Moore or Lindsay Lohan or Jennifer Aniston (“Striptease,” “I Know Who Killed Me” and “We’re the Millers,” respectively) or any of the myriad other famous actresses who have performed onscreen stripteases. So in compiling this list, some trawling through the darker recesses of recent movie history was necessary, but this is the kind of thing we do for you guys. So here are the fruits of that hard, hard labor: 15 Male Striptease Scenes ranked in ascending order. You may toss a dollar onstage at the end if you wish.
15. “Forces of Nature” (1999)
To say that this is the best scene in the lame, contrived “Forces of Nature” is faint praise, but it is the one time in this film which there seems to be even a hint of chemistry between Ben Affleck‘s normcore dullard and his possible soulmate, Sandra Bullock‘s manic pixie free spirit. Due to a series of progressively tiresome and increasingly less believable mishaps, they end up penniless in a gay bar where Affleck is prevailed upon to strip for money. Thankfully, one of dreamgirl’s many previous jobs was as an exotic dancer, so she can show him the ropes! He doesn’t get more naked than a shy dude on a breezy day at the beach, and the dutch angles are hideous, but Affleck’s transition from awkward to kind-of-getting-into-it is the high point of the film. Seriously, you’re best off switching off after this.
14. “Summer School” (1987)
So this is also a pretty terrible film, almost as bad as “riff on the ‘Inspirational Teacher’ movie played for laughs starring Mark Harmon and Kirstie Alley” makes it sound. An artifact of the late-’80s, this comedy sees Harmon as an unenthusiastic gym teacher forced to teach a bunch of misfit students during his summer vacation —care to take a guess at whether he Learns a Little About Life and/or Wins the Girl via his encounters? Anyway, there is one lively scene, courtesy of one of his particularly dim-bulb students (Ken Olandt) who moonlights as a stripper by night. We don’t see too much of his routine, and Harmon’s goggling and the tongue-out salivating of the women are distracting to say the least, but what we do see looks pretty slick. In all senses of the word.
13. “The Proposal” (2009)
The second of two entries here to feature Sandra Bullock —which I’m sure tells us something about the nature of the roles she chooses— makes it onto this list less for the stripper’s raw sex appeal than for his victim’s highly relatable cringing embarrassment that Ramon’s (Oscar Nunez) “erotic dance” inspires. Tricked into an impromptu bachelorette party while visiting the hometown of her fiance-of-convenience (Ryan Reynolds), Bullock’s uptight harridan character is “treated” to some unsophisticated Girls’ Night fun, much to her horror. But while he’s not the buff Chippendale we get elsewhere, Ramon’s unashamed celebration of his highly ordinary physicality is endearing, and the affection that the women of the small community have for him is oddly sweet. He seems so happy —bless him!
12. “Love & Basketball” (2000)
Gina Prince-Bythewood‘s low-key romantic drama didn’t do huge business on release, but it has grown in evaluation ever since as a sincere and well-made love story that occupies the not-often-seen crossroads of, as the title suggests, romance and b-ball. But even those who may have forgotten everything else about this film probably recall this scene, where childhood, basketball-obsessed besties/now college-age lovers Omar Epps and Sanaa Lathan engage in a game of “strip basketball” in a dorm room —a twist on a regular game of one-on-one that sees him “lose.” There’s not a lot of flesh shown for titillation purposes, but that’s not really the reason for the scene. Instead, this is a character-driven stripping moment that reveals genuine chemistry between the participants and sets up the mirror-image finale.
11. “Jarhead” (2005)
Only fairly low on the list because there’s not enough of the scene, plus we don’t actually see him strip (he barrels into the scene already clothesless except for a Santa hat on his head and one on his Rudolph), Jake Gyllenhaal‘s dance is memorable not just because it shows off his rather well-sculpted rear in all its G-string-ed glory, but also because it’s a strange moment in Sam Mendes‘ tonally unconvincing but interesting film. Really, it’s an evocation of the boredom, bro-dom and bravado that can set in among military troops trained for ultimate machismo, but seeing too little, ahem, action —and as such this scene, though humorous, has a kind of edge of hysteria that makes it feel truthful. Also: butt.