In the slowest weekend of the moviegoing year, “How To Train Your Dragon” has managed to best all prognostications and blast its way back to first place, now in its fifth week. There was very little dropoff from the surprising fourth-week frame, and at this point “Dragon,” numbers-wise still a modest performer for its genre, should surpass Dreamworks’ last ‘toon, “Monsters Vs. Aliens.” In an off-season, that’s a big reason for celebration, and we hope it inspires many other sexually suggestive kid’s film titles, like “The Boy With The Bony Snake” and “Learning To Cope With Your Hairy Cave.”
At #2 was CBS Films’ “The Back-Up Plan,” which did mediocre business, and yet stronger numbers than most could except. CBS Films previously debuted with “Extraordinary Measures” so they do seem committed to TV-level plots and material, but at least “Plan” doubled “Measures”‘s opening weekend. Jennifer Lopez was front-and-center for the ads, so after having the movie postponed and her record company dropping her, a $12 million debut suggests there’s still something of a fanbase and, better yet, she’s not an albatross to a modest film like she was in the “Jersey Girl” days where they kept her out of promos entirely. Many people are painting the numbers for this film as a failure, but the premise was sub-sitcom, and most empty-premise films in offseasons even with big stars don’t do that level of business (“A Good Year” and “Love Happens” come to mind). Plus, how expensive could this thing have been?
In week #3, “Date Night” held strong, bringing its total to $63 million, and, all things considered, its performed like a reliable programmer. Considering the ad budget, this might not see a profit theatrically, but eventually the damn thing’s gonna be a TBS/FX juggernaut. And we had “The Back-Up Plan” and at #4, there was fellow new arrival “The Losers”… no wonder the weekend was quiet. No one wants to see a movie with an apathetic or negative title. People aren’t going to show up for “The Longshots” or “The Replacement Killers” or “Whatever Works,” so calling your high-octane action film “The Losers” is the same as titling it “The Douchebags” or “The Toilet Stoppers.” We hear the budget’s modest, but how can that be with the delays and reshoots? If anything, we would wager “The Losers” is the type of movie that would earn its bread on cable and DVD, but we also figured it was the type of movie to open to $15 mil. Odd enough that the ads obscured the film’s only bankable commodity in Idris Elba — check the numbers, Hollywood, more people want to see this guy than that Clive Owen-Javier Bardem mash-up and that obnoxious Human Torch fella.
Dropping to #5 was “Kick-Ass,” which seems poised to top $40-50 million before dying a quick death. Our theory? As shiny and exciting as the promos made it look, adults cannot be moved to see an R-rated film starring children. It’s the absurd double standard towards children and film — people can’t buy the emotional and physical immaturity of children triumphing over adults, and yet they love emotionally-stunted man-children around the age of 20-30. We’ll turn out to see Adam Sandler play another one of his garden-variety retards, but we just can’t get behind this cursing ten year old girl.
It’s probably because of the 3D screens, but “Clash of the Titans,” opened at the same level as director Louis Letterier’s “Incredible Hulk” and has already outdrawn that film. Opinions seem to be lukewarm on the film, but its hard to quibble with a decent $150 total, which the film is approaching. “Death At A Funeral,” meanwhile, has to look like a disappointment after a heavy ad presence and a loaded cast, as its not even going to do Tyler Perry numbers. Take note: this is the second time within three years that “Death At A Funeral” has failed to catch on at the domestic box office.
Disney made some healthy change with “Oceans,” which opened on Earth Day and is completing an $8 million week, proving that the real heroes when it comes to saving the world are in Disney Marketing. Meanwhile, the white Tyler Perry, Nicholas Sparks, sees his first studio writing gig, “The Last Song,” resolutely finish its run as a solid $60 million hit. Hanging out at the bottom is “Alice In Wonderland,” which is winding down it’s run with a total of Oh God America Why Did You All See This.*
1. How To Stroke Your Dragon – $15 million ($178 mil.)
2. Aging Starlet Thinks She’s Still 30 – $12.3 million
3. Date Night – $10.6 million ($63 mil.)
4. The Losers – $9.6 million
5. Worst Comic Ever – $9.5 million ($35 mil.)
6. Clash Of The Sweaty Men – $9 million ($146 mil.)
7. Death At A Funeral – $8 million ($28 mil.)
8. Oceans – $6 million ($8.5 mil.)
9. The Last Song – $3.7 million ($55 mil.)
10. Tim Burton’s Scrapbook – $2.2 million ($327 mil.)
*Note this is not a strictly American issue: the film is poised to challenge $1 billion worldwide.